One of my passions.. is planning! I used to plan my birthday parties pretty much the day after my birthday party... I would try to wait until 6 months before my birthday to give my list to my parents.. emphasis on the word TRY ... I would plan my parties to the minute.. I had it all planned. I used to think it was just cuz I wanted it to be MY birthday and while the majority of that is true :) and now I don't like MY birthdays so much, time has a funny way of making them less exciting :), I know now that one of my gifting's, is planning.
My Faith is the same ... she has a wedding book that she has started with all her ideas and even designing her dresses! my sister Shash and I used to buy wedding magazines at 14/15 years old and dream our Cinderella and Fairy Princess dream weddings come true.
Part of my job at work is planning... and for the most part I am really good at it and enjoy it immensely. Lately I have let a few things slip due to the amount of balls I am juggling but regardless I am good and I know it and I love it even more.
So now here I am at the lovely age of 38 planning a wedding in just under 4 months time... I don't usually do things the "easy" way and I am always up for a good challenge..add that to my workaholic self then add a dash of control freak and mix in a good dose of "oh my I am SO HAPPY and I can't wait to start my life with this man" ... and well 4 months seems like a LONG time ;)
I totally scored on the dress! my brother in law happened upon a store close to where he is working and texted me and his daughter in law to be (they are getting married next summer)... so we went on Friday with 2 of my girls and I said "yes to the dress" ... and I got a deal of the year! a $1200 Alfred Sung dress for $200!! and it's the dress that I WANT! I didn't want to spend a lot of money on the dress but I also wanted to buy the dress that I wanted..not what I was told I was allowed to spend... and there was none of that on my man's side..in fact he is over generous when it comes to me.. feels amazing... but I found it and I got a great deal..what could be better then that?! seeing myself in the mirror at the store I found I totally had "that moment".. I teared up, my girls teared up, my niece in law teared up.. there was no doubt it was MY dress! It was also a "this is so happening" moment in a whirlwind of planning and courting and a surge of pure joy totally filled me.
I knew what I basically wanted in the dress...nothing poofy, nothing too sparkly, nothing that looks age inappropriate and that is something I wasn't sure about... what is age appropriate? or 2nd marriage appropriate? and even having to say this is not my first time at the rodeo...was hard..not what I imagined for my life and yet here I am and I cannot imagine being more happy (well there is an on-going issue that is not happy in my life but I am not ready to blog about it) ... I wanted to look like a bride but know I am not a "young" bride or a first time bride and was unsure what the rules to that are or if there are even any rules to my situation. So I looked for a dress that I felt comfortable in, that I knew he would be so proud of and then what I could afford. ... I am so happy to have found all 3. I didn't know about the head dress part... I struggled with the veil part... after all my 4 girls pretty much give away the "not a virgin" kind of thing. I didn't know what others would think and that is also a weird thing to be conscious of.. I mean in the end who cares but in a lifetime of judgement I don't really want to bare more. I guess I wasn't sure if a veil was a mature brides look? ... in the end I just went with what my daughters said and I am good with that.... you have to wait for the wedding pictures to find out what I ended up buying or not buying :)
Now I am in full bloom planning stage... and I have stroked a lot of things off my list! Biggest thing now is the guest list... we have a ceremony venue that has room for 200! but are keeping the reception to family and a handful of close friends only... big surprise we are having the reception at my family's restaurant and I have rented a dance floor ... food and drinks are planned but the venue will only hold so many and we both have incredibly large families. Like with everything else lately and especially where the wedding plans are concerned, things will fall into place as they should ... you really couldn't ask for more evidence that we are on the right path.
Even with all the planning I do and the planning I have done I know that not all things are in my control and my life has been a big testimony to that. I do know that I am blessed and loved and if all my plans for our special day don't pan out my life is amazing and I am just so happy that soon I will be sharing it with someone I totally love.