If you haven't figured it out... I am talking about Love.... and I am IN .... not without my eyes wide open and I admit my heart is still a little guarded but not as much these days. I am finding that I am able to see a future that is secure... stable... and full of happiness WITH someone at my side. Not pulling not pushing but walking beside me just as happy to be there as I am... and that... that feels wonderful and amazing. As I walk forward in my life with the fab 5 I have discovered and rediscovered things about my self that I love... I have challenges for sure! being a single parent of 4 is no walk in the park... but I love my life and now I have found someone that equally loves it... it's pretty cool.. understatement.
Not looking for someone to MAKE me happy. Not needing someone to CARRY me. Not needing someone to SUPPORT me. Not looking to FILL a void in my life. Coming from a place where I had found my peace with my life and where I was... and then this wonderful Christian Stable Happy Family-Oriented... did I mention stable?! :) that was huge for me!! man to walk into my life when he did.. when all I was just looking for was a night out here and there and thinking it would take me a while to weed out some major duds before I found a good guy.... wasn't expecting it and that's when I have heard it finds you.... and it did... and if nothing else it has shown me that life is far from over in the love department.. that there are really great amazing men still out there... I had started to wonder! :) ... and when you have done the work yourself ... changed for yourself... really examined your life.. wonderful things happen to you!
As for love... I think it is a choice... it's something you decide , I mean feelings are feelings but when you have lived and walked through some valleys you have a more realistic view point of what love really is.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
How true that passage is!
I love that this guy is all about showing me how he feels and what his intentions are... not just muttering mere words but showing me and showing the girls that he is who he says he is and that speaks so much more to me, to us ( I am a TOTAL package ), then uttering words! words without actions are dead after all.
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
Right now I know what season I am in, I see my life with clarity and through the knowledge that there indeed is SO much more life to live... alone with my girls or with someone wonderful at my side... my future looks amazing!! but having someone tell you with honesty that they have been waiting all this time to find you ... it's pretty awesome!