On Friday I was able to do prayer ministry with one of my new neighbors. I also prayed thru an issue with another neighbor Thursday night. Man, I LOVE praying with people and watching them find freedom. It is exhilarating for me and I am going to be praying several more times with the one lady. Reading thru my notebooks and handbooks again really made me see how many areas in my own life that I have let slide. I get so easily caught in the negative and putting myself and my girls down. This really has to stop. I have all this great information and need to apply more of it to myself.
This weekend was really challenging with the girls. Finally on Saturday I heard myself yelling at them " you never listen. you are always so stubborn. why can't you just listen to me." etc.... I was feeling totally overwhelmed with them and at the end of a very short rope. Patience had vacated the building and anger was taking it's place. I was driving Foo to a B-party on Sat afternoon and I felt such a strong conviction of taking my own advice. Watching what I say over myself and my children. Instead of yelling at them you never listen, start saying over them, you listen to your mommy and are an obedient child...... I also was convicted on how much time I spend watching tv and on the computer while they are home and awake. I need to make myself a schedule I think and really make an effort to follow it...........this from a person who is extremely random and fly by the seats of my pants kind of girl. I need to take control back. I need to find/make more quiet time and one on one time with the girls.
J comes home in 3 sleeps and I don't want him to come home to an overtired worn out grumpy lady who says "here take the brats"..... I want him to walk into a clean house and children who are not stressed out by their stressed out mom! I have to walk out what I teach and believe. I hope this all makes sense. It is just time for a life long change and take my own advice!