I took the pics leaning out the truck window so they are not the best but you get the idea of how colorful it is here! these were taken on the way to our house a block away.....a farm block mind you!
So part 2 of our story
After I graduated from high school I headed to Kenya Africa with YWAM. I met with J before I left and we talked about getting back together. I didn't really date anyone after we broke up cuz now the standard had been raised and I felt that we were meant to be together..... I just didn't know if it was possible anymore. We decided to just be friends as I was going to be gone for almost 6 months. I thought about him a lot when I was gone and wrote to him and he wrote to me. When I got back we met together and at that time I was really gun ho on missions and going back to the mission field. He was into the party scene and we quickly realized that we still had strong feelings for each other but were heading in two different directions. So that was that. I dated other guys and about a year later I met Morgan's bio-donor. That in itself is a whole other post but if you have been reading my blog for awhile you will know that things ended badly and left me devastated and my life forever changed.
While I was going thru hell on earth and loosing friends left right and center and trying to figure out where my life was headed now that I was 19 and pregnant and alone by choice and angry and hurt and so many things, J had been working for a guy that lived close to me and drove past my street everyday. Everyday he was thinking about me and wanting to come see me but didn't know how to make that move. Finally one day I called J. I needed a friend and I knew he would be there for me. I was hopeful in the back of my head and the fore front of my heart that he would be more than just a friend but I knew it would be unfair to impose on him the bundle package that was becoming me. Talking to him on the phone all the feelings were still there......like right there......for him too. I asked him to my friends B-party and he agreed to take me. Seeing him standing outside the screen door for the first time in over a year my heart almost stopped. He had filled out during that time and oh.my.gosh. what a babe! like seriously hot hot hot hot! The attraction we both felt was still there and later when he brought me home he said he wanted to tell me something, he had been wanting to tell me for a long time and had a speech for me...........I had to stop him. I couldn't let him pour out his heart and feelings to me before he knew what had happened to me and that I was pregnant and things with me were not so good. He was visibly shaken. He started saying over and over that should be my baby that should be my baby....... oh the gut wrenching pain that it wasn't and what to do now. Asking him to be more than a friend was something I wanted but couldn't ask of him. I was 19 he was 20.......kind of young for all this. Like I knew he would be he was there for me and we did end up dating again but New Years Day he said that he just wasn't ready for this and wasn't ready to give up his friends and settle down. OK I was hurt but what could I do? so I waited.
He came to see us in the hospital after Morgan was born. He told me he was proud of me and that she was the most beautiful baby he had ever seen. I cried after he left. I was so unsure of everything, my future, my life, my walk with God. Afterall how could God allow this to happen to me??? I had a plan! I was going to be a missionary! not a single mom!
He would come over a couple of times a week to see me and Morgan. He came over when bio-donor signed the birth certificate and I could see his rage. I had bad advice from a lawyer and was told no matter how I got pregnant that since I knew who the father was I had to put him on the birth certificate. He started coming round more and more and when he left to go live with his dad for a few months in California he called and asked me to come with Morgan for a visit. I celebrated my 20th birthday with him there, Morgan was 3 months old.
After he got home we broke up again. He still had party on the brain and that was somewhere I just couldn't go. By about November he was around again all the time. I could tell he was ready now to commit. I knew the wait was almost over. February 25 1995 he asked me to marry him. We were married Sept 30 1995. Morgan was one of the flower girls she was 1 1/2 years old, she wore a white dress too and was made part of the ceremony.
We didn't have a fairy tale honeymoon and life as newlyweds was not so blissful! It was very difficult. As you can imagine there were some deep hurts and major adjustments to be made. J did officially adopt Morgan when she was 4 years old, she really is his now in everyway.
Tomorrow I will post some more about our new married life together and the obstacles we overcame.